I suffered from extreme panic attacks & anxiety disorders. However it has significantly reduce over the years. The word panic attack still haunt me to till this.
What I remember from my attacks is the feeling of suffocation, unbearable thoughts and losing control over yourself. My heart racing, my blood rushing, I am breathing too fast and my whole body is shaking uncontrollable. I felt every single cell on my body is going to explode.
The worst part is these attack happen in no certain time nor place. That is the part that haunt me, because I used to feel so embarrassed when it happened especially in public place. The trigger of panic attacks are unknown. So I started to avoid going to public place and spend most of my days isolating. That make the whole situation even worse. My physical & emotional became pretty detached. I may be physically in one place but my senses are in other which is often called depersonalisation. I could no longer sense emotion, thoughts or perception. My body felt numb & my mind is blurred.
Based on mental health researches it states: Our mind is very complex system. It has the power to switch off and go completely into survival mode often called self-preservation reaction from the brain. Causing Anxiety isn’t is your fault but it is caused based on your traumas, genetics, neurobiology, life experiences & family history.
Over the years of suffering, I learnt that I cannot control my attacks, but I can however learn how to manage to live with those anxiety. Although it is not always possible to avoid those triggers but awareness of those triggers can give you clarity. I learn to slow things down and be mindful. I started to accept that this thing happening to me isn’t my fault and embrace that it is part of my journey.
I keep trying better ways for self-care that works for me. Remember everyone coping journey is different, take time to learn what strategies works for you. Last of all, be positive & have hope that things get better.
& you are not alone…….
Mindfulness is a way of befriending ourselves and our experience”.
I have put together gorgeous guideline for how to meditate for beginners. You can also check out my guided meditation on my youtube channel to relax mind and body from hectic world.
Sometimes going through tough times helps to keep things in perspective & shape us. Traumatic experiences give us a thicker skin and learn to value our life much more.
1. Live in the moment & take it slow
It is hard to live in the moment especially with this modern age when we are looking for instant gravitation and instant rewards. Keeping up with the pace make us feel anxious. Its important that we take time & slow things down. Be present and mindful with our life no matter what we are doing. If one day you have to look back life & it seems all blurry and then surely, it wasn’t a life well-lived.
2. ALWAYS BELIEVE IN SOMETHING.
What you believe is what you become. Doesn’t matter what it is, doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks believe in it.
3. KNOW YOUR AIMS
In order figure out the direction of your how to reach your aims is to establish your goal first. Just like when traveling, it is easier to pick a destination than to decide what transportation to take. Otherwise, a goal without directions is to go on vacation with no set destination.
4. EVERYONE across your path IS WORTH KNOWING.
Life is longest fleeting journey and it encounter you to meet many different people on your journey and each and every one of them is worth knowing. To someone you’ve met, you could someday be the next story they tell.
5. Unleash YOUR INNER CHILD.
Life itself can be stressful. Sometime it is good to break those boundaries of behaving certain way by unleashing your inner child. Always allow yourself to be child and have purest form of freedom. Do not let the limitations of this world made you hold your back.
6. PUSH YOUR BOUNDARIES.
If we don’t push ourselves out of boundaries, we never know what we are capable of. Vagueness- lack of certainty is something that stop us from breaking free. Knowing you can do is an enlightment.
7. Be present with your loved ones.
With all the distractions around us, its important that our loved ones are loved & heard. Ophrah once said even after over 30,000 people on show everyone come up with one desire that is to be heard and to be seen.
8. Let go
Do yourself a favor and find a way to forgive and move on. Holding on to bitterness and anger will only hurt you. It doesn’t mean you necessarily forget what happened, but forgiveness allows you to release the negative and make more room for the positive.
9. MAKE YOUR HEALTH A PRIORITY.
We all know our body responds well to a healthy lifestyle, so as our mind. In order to get the maximum performance of mind and body, it is important to maintain a healthy lifestyle.
If you are optimists, you see things in life as an opportunity. Be positive and appreciate little things in life. Afterall, life is all about journey not the destination.
Meditation is a simple but life-transforming technique that help you to relax, enhance understanding about yourself and ground us.
When the word meditation comes to our mind, we feel reluctant as stillness to sit for minutes and to have empty mind can make us feel intimidated.
Hence when you are starting out its easiest way to begin meditating by using guided meditation as a starting point. Please check out my guided meditation video for beginners helping you to ease your meditation practice by using approaches like focusing on the breath.
Guideline for Meditation for beginners
- Choose a quiet environment. Find a peaceful and quiet place where you can sit down and relax without getting disturbed.
- Sit. Place your hands overlapping on your thighs and relax your shoulder. Don’t worry about what to do with your hands, just feel relax. Lotus position is ideal but not necessary if you are just starting out to practice meditation. The main focus is to straighten your back so that you are not causing any tension in your lower back. You can either sit on the floor cross-legged with the support of a meditation cushion, or on any chair with your feet resting on the ground.
- Focus on breathe. Take a few deep breaths inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Start closing your eyes softly. Direct your soft, unfocused gaze downwards. Don’t force your breathing; let it come naturally. Take as long as you need to breathe slowly and deeply.
- Mindfulness. As your deepened your breath, you will begin to feel calmer and more relaxed. Slowly focus your attention on your breathing. When your focus shifts start bringing to your breath. As you develop greater focus power, you will find it easier to concentrate.
- Bringing your awareness back. When your guided meditation session ends, bring up your awareness and stretch yourself to release all your tensions.
- Wear comfortable clothes and keep yourself warm.
- Start your meditation with short length and increase slowly. I have different meditation videos on my channel to suits your needs. Feel free to explore https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCigoGsUghLXZ2uWUB4PCOnw
What is Hygge?
Hygge is the word originates from a Norwegian word that means wellbeing. Hygge also means hug.
Especially where I lived in England, as the darker winter days approach it’s natural to feel a bit gloom at the thought of no sunshine, cold grey weather, dark mornings and evenings.
Its a perfect time to Hygge in these cold winter months .
Hygge is all about self care combined with connection with other people and creating an environment that feels cosy and safe.
The Happiness Institute of Denmark have found that makes Danes social relationship happiest, is that Hygge puts small social gatherings at it’s heart.
Here’s 10 ways to how to benefits of big does of Danish Hyggee
1.Getting warmer lightening
Hygge lighting is about creating a warmer light that feels cosy and comforting instead of harsh lights.
Having small lamps or fairy lights give room warmer and cozier vibe.
2. Cosy your house with soft furnishings
Have furnishings in your house made out of natural materials like wood and cozy up with soft cushions and blankets.
3.Snuggle up in your woolies
Socks, jumpers, hats and scarves are all hygge.So snuggle up.
4. Join the slow food process
Take time to cook and enjoy the process instead of rushing. Slow process is super hygge.
Hot drinks are super hygge. There is even term refer coffee as Kaffehygge!
6. Start a gratitude journal
Taking time to think and reflect is also hygge. Curl up in your hygge journal and write down all the things you’re thankful for.
7. Cook together
A hygge tradition is cooking together with others. Social relationships is heart of hygge, bringing togetherness.
8. Work life balance
It is believes Danes have the best working hours in the world with most of them working around 30-35 hours maximum. How does your work / life balance measure up and how can you tweaks to your liefstyle?
9. Scents of smell
Use the scents to take your advantage during cold winter months. Either by lightening a candle, burning a wood. Use scents warm scents like orange, cloves, cinnamon in your house to create the warm and cozy environment.
10. Go camping
Eventhough going camping is the last thing that comes to mind when it comes to winter months, it will provide you with a heart of hygge terms like togetherness and connection with people and being in nature and of course, the opportunity to enjoy a campfire!
WHAT ARE THE CAUSES OF METNAL BURNOUT?
Modern society has made people more stress than ever in history. Our society has given many options and make our life more difficult on daily basics. There are different types of burnout – mental, physical, and emotional.
For this blog I want to focus on the concept of mental burnout. Mental breakout especially effect to people who overthinks, anxious and perfectionists.
What are the signs of mental burnout?
Here are 10 signs of mental burnout
- Losing ability to think clearly and focus.
- Finding hard to make decisions
- Lack of motivation
- Frustration and losing patience
- Feeling invalid
- Sensitive emotions -becoming happy at one minute and sad at another minute
- Sleeping disorder -either sleeping too much or sleeping less.
- Lost of appetite
- Avoiding social interaction
It is common that while everybody experiences some negative emotions from time to time, it’s important to notice when these are becoming unusual and get uncontrollable for you. Sometimes, you may not even notice the signs of mental burnout. However, if keep ignoring burnout signs, it can have big impact on your health such as chronic disease, depression, obesity. It can also effects happiness, relationships and job performance in long term.
It’s important to know what signs to look out to address the causes of mental burnout.
How to cope mental burnout:
- Unplug and unwind
On day of when you feel mentally drained and doing normal things feel like a chore, it is time to unplug it and unwind. Take relaxation and self care seriously especially when anxiety and negative energy is embedding in your mind. Give yourself a time to relax and take step back.
2. Stop your inner critcs
Mental Burnout can be sometime can come from self-doubt. When your needs mismatch what you get, your inner critic increases. Therefore it is important to know how you can deal with self-doubt. When you spend all of your time and energy worrying about whether something you’ve done is good enough or not. You will end up getting no where. So it’s important to quit your inner critics and start focusing on your growth.
Many researchers proven that not getting enough sleep is one of the thing that contribute mental breakdown. It is proven that human body needs 6-8 hours of sleep a day. If you do not have enough sleep, your brain function poorly. That way you become indecisive, sensitive to situations, loose patience, overthink things and become less productive.
4. Know when to say No
It is sometimes hard to say No others, especially if you are people-pleaser. Saying yes to everything will cause you burden. So it is important to learn when and how to say NO.
5. Plan and organise
Mental burnout is due over stimulation of our brain. It is important that we stay organise to clear our head. Write down to do list, that way you are less likely to add less worry about forgetting something.
6. Foucs on present rather than Future
Another factor of causing mental breakout is constant thinking ahead of the future and filling your head with thoughts of what could be. Future thoughts can feel overwhelmed and made you mentally drained. Focus on what you can do today.
7. Get out in nature
Studies show that without regular immersion in nature, we can suffer physical and emotional distress. In one study, 95 percent of those interviewed said their mood improved after spending time outside.
Did you notice any signs of mental burnout, if so what actions did you take to take care of yourself?
What is pomodoro method? Does it really boost productivity?
How did it start?
It was Created in the 1980s by person named Francesco Cirillo.
The word Pomodoro in Italian mean “Tomato”, Francesco was using kitchen timer shaped like an tomato that time. Hence the name generated as Pomodoro.
So what actually is pomodoro method?
It is a time management philosophy that aim provide the user with maximum focus and creativity freshness.
This philosophy allow user to complete projects faster, proactively and less fatigue.
Here is how the process works
The user works for 25 minutes straight, get 5 minutes break.
Each 25-minute work period is called a “Pomodoro”
After one pomodoro, you get 5 minutes break.
After 4 “pomodoros” have passed which is equivalent of 100 minutes, you can then take a 15-20 minute break.
Why should we use Pomodoro method?
Benefits of pomodoro include:
- Having Frequent breaks mean it keeps your mind fresh and focused
- Allow you to less procrastinate
- Watching the timer wind down can urge you to wrap up your current task more quickly
- Spreading a task over 2 or 3 pomodoros can keep your mind less fatigue
- It helps to organise your plan instead of jumping one task to another, which make you more productive
These days there are apps where you can use for applying Pomodoro Technique or you can just use kitchen timer.
What are the critics pomodoro user have?
Strict Rule – It has to be performed in strict environment, where you can’t be easily distracted. For instant, if you are writing an report in an office you won’t be able to take any phone that is ringing in the office.
what are my thoughts?
I have tested myself, but I am in fortunate position to work in undisturbed enviroment. So it works wonder for me.
Here are my thoughts on Pomodoro Technique, yes it did made me completely focused and more productive. Especially the project when I have to work with tight deadlines. It works like miracle.
However, I am not sure about how this technique will work someone who has lots of busy schedule, phone calls and meeting.
Have you try Pomodoro technquie? Share me your thoughts in the comment section.
“Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits,Your habits become your values, Your values become your destiny.”— Gandhi
One thing I learnt from coming out from dark times to positive living is to start my life by creating good habits.
In order to ease your life to positive thinking and gratitude is to build up the good habits first.
We all want to build our good habits, that serves us with the purpose which then often leads to caring mentally and physically.
Good habits are hard to maintain but so great once you mastered it, it then comes naturally. The more it comes naturally, the more you feel better about yourself and establish positive living.
In Kundalini yoga tradition, its believed you can mastered your habits by doing daily. It is believed that
It takes 40 days, to break a negative habit.
It takes 90 days, to establish a new habit.
It takes 120 days, to ingrain a new habit.
It takes 1000 days, to master your new habit.
Lots of good things in life come with patience. Here is how to process your habits:
New habit to existing behaviour
Start with 1 or 2 good habits something you are already doing it, a behaviour to your existing behaviour. That way you are more likely to succeed. Start with something small and build it up.
Start tracking your habits. In that way, you feel motivated and you are more like to stick to your habits. For instant, write down your habit and put 40 boxes next to it. Cross out each box daily. Once you reached 40 days, do it for another 80 days to fully ingrain new habit. This is how I build up new habits gradually.
Create an environment
I am a true believer that environment drives your behaviour. If you want to create a good habit, you have to have build good environment to ease new habit into your life. By changing the activation energy of your behaviours, it is more likely that you adhere to new habits.
For instant, if your habit is to eat less junk food you can’t have a kitchen that have lots of snack. You are more likely to eat, just because its infront of you.
Mihaly Csikzentmihalyi, he strongly explained about activation energy i.e to decrease the activation on habits you wanted to create and to increase the activation energy on habits you want to get rid of .
Example of mine is, my goal habit was to wake up at 5 am and to read more & consuming less time on technology in bed time.
One of the thing I do is to put a book near my bed 1 hour before I sleep and put my phone/laptop away in another room.
Putting a book near my bed decrease my activation energy. Its infront of me so I will read it.
Putting my technology devices away increase my activation energy, since it is away I am less likely to get up.
Set up your intentions
It is common that intentions of setting up new habit are very strong at first but gradually disappeared as time goes.
If you have clear intention what that new habit will take you, you are more likely to stick to it.
Example of what I did is that I wrote down my intention of each habit beside my habit tracker. That way I can vision it every day without losing my initial intentions.
Schedule your habit
If you want to create your new habit, you need to learn how to prioritise it. This is something you need to schedule and plan it. Give a space in your schedule to actually do it.
Don’t beat up for it
There are days especially at the beginning when you would miss one or two. But don’t beat yourself for it. Start fresh next day with good motivation.
Reward small steps
Last thing, reward yourself for small steps at 40 days, 90 days, 120 days, and at 1000 days. It is not easy to build up a new habit. We human being, are likely to stick to what’s in our comfort zone and once we do something that is out of our comfort zone and put an effort for it. Its a huge progress. So reward yourself at each milestones.